Of Light And Shadows

“I didn’t have you down as a hugger,” Jia mumbled into Beelzebub’s chest.

“I hug anyone that gives me chocolate,” he answered, setting her back on her feet and releasing her at last. Her ribs groaned as they returned to their normal shape.

“Who’s Bee hugging?” Belphegor asked as he sat up, yawning and rubbing his eyes.

“Jia,” Mammon answered.

“Oh. I want one.” Bell was still half asleep but he stood and pulled her into a gentle embrace anyway. “Want to watch a movie tonight? It’s been years since we did that.”

“Are you sure you could stay awake for it?”

“No,” he grinned. “But the start of the movie is always fun and I like popcorn.”

“Did somebody say popcorn? Can I come too?” Bee asked. Mammon started laughing as Jia spluttered, confused by the outpouring of friendliness from all of them despite Lucifer’s warning about her being in danger.

“You’re only interested because there’s gonna be food,” Bell said.

“And?” Bee answered. “Food and new friends sounds like a fun night.”

“I really appreciate the offer, both of you, but I’ve had a really long day,” Jia answered hesitantly. “My best friend got turned into a Vampire. I’d like to just sleep tonight if that’s okay.” She saw the disappointment in Bell’s eyes. “But I’d love to watch a movie tomorrow with you.” His smile returned and Bee grinned as well.

“I’ll bring the popcorn,” the huge Demon said.

“And I’ll try not to fall asleep,” Bell nodded. She grinned back and stifled a yawn, fighting off the sudden exhaustion.

Mammon noticed and stood, gesturing for her to follow him as everyone else descended back into amicable chatter. She turned back to see Lucifer’s red eyes watching her as she left. She waved and he smiled faintly.

“I sure didn’t expect that,” Mammon said. “Those guys really like you, shortstack.”

“I thought Bee was going to eat me.”

“He probably was until you gave him the pudding.”

“Sorry about that, I know you wanted it.”

“I don’t mind. I swiped Bell’s while he was sleeping,” he grinned, pulling another pudding cup out of his pocket to show her. Jia chuckled and shook her head at him.

“It still astounds me that you can get human food in this realm.”

“Technically it isn’t human food. But it’s made here and humans could eat it without a problem so it’s not really any different to a chocolate pudding where you come from.”

“When I first came here I had no idea that Demons even liked our food.”

“What did you expect us to eat?”

“People.”

“You’re thinking of zombies. Or Bee.”

“He’s eaten someone?”

“I wouldn’t put it past him. I once watched him eat a bowl of plastic fruit because it looked real. When I told him it was fake he shrugged and carried on eating.” Jia blinked. He turned to look at her and smiled. “I’m kidding.”

“Idiot,” she grinned. He elbowed her playfully before throwing an arm around her shoulders. It was the closest Mammon usually got to initiating a hug even in private.

“It’s good to have you back here.”

“It’s good to be back,” she replied. “It kind of felt like coming home.”

“You missed this place that much?”

“My earliest memories are of this world. Of course I missed it.” She smiled. “Actually one of the first memories I have is of you.” He looked at her in surprise. “The day you found me with a head injury you called me shortstack when I couldn’t tell you my name.”

“Huh. I thought the bump on the noggin might have stopped you remembering that day.” His amber eyes were warm as he watched her. “Did you ever find out what happened to you?”

“No. I don’t remember much more than I did when Lucifer let me go home. Nothing came back to me. My parents called me Lisbeth but it still doesn’t feel like my name because most of my life is a void.”

“Damn, that must’ve been some head injury.” They stopped outside the door to her room. She remembered standing in that exact spot with Mammon a hundred times when she was younger. “Everything should be how it was in there except the new bedding. We didn’t move anything in case you ever came back.”

“You thought I’d come back?”

“Sure I did. We made a pact, remember? I wasn’t gonna let you disappear into the human world without a trace.” He grinned and turned to go, waving over his shoulder. “Night, shortstack. I’ll see you at breakfast.” She chuckled and ducked inside, breathing in the scent of her old room and letting out a long, heavy sigh.

Sleep didn’t come easily to Jia that night, and when it did come it brought with it a strange mixture of flashbacks from her struggle with the Vampires.

She saw Evander reaching out to help her escape a beating from her father, only for him to be dragged away by lashing ropes of shadows, and then the two Vampires would snarl and she’d find herself in the alley again, watching as they drained his life away.

She woke with a yell in the middle of the night, a light sheen of sweat coating her forehead as her chest heaved. The unfamiliar room confused her for a moment, adding to her panic. She saw the books she used to love and the same band posters that Mammon liked decorating her walls and she started to relax.

“Jia? You okay?” The voice at the door belonged to him. She passed a hand over her eyes, still trying to shake off the grip of her nightmare. “I’m coming in alright?”

The door opened and he padded in, clearly having just woken up himself. His hair was mussed and he was still blinking away sleep, but there was a concerned frown on his face as his amber eyes searched the room for danger.

“I’m a light sleeper anyway,” he shrugged. “Was it a nightmare?” Mammon’s room was next to hers in the hall so she wasn’t surprised he’d heard her yell.

“Sort of. It was kind of a flashback to the alley. I wish it’d been a flashback of my old life instead of those awful Vampires attacking Evan.” She reached up to touch the spot where her head injury had been years before.

The skin was smooth and unmarked beneath her hair thanks to the medical practices in the Demonic Realm, but she remembered the feel of the bandages around her head and how it had throbbed with pain every time she tried to sleep for weeks.

“Sometimes things just don’t go how we want them to.” He studied her face for a moment. “Your eyes look brighter than I remember.”

“That’s because they are. I’ve never met anyone with eyes the same shade as mine and I’ve definitely never seen anyone whose eyes get a more intense colour as they get older.”

“It is pretty unique,” Mammon nodded. “Teal eyes could just be another genetic quirk. The Lotura are prone to more of them than regular humans so it could be pure chance.”

“I assumed my crazy eye colour was down to my mother’s Fae blood.”

“Fae usually have purple or blue eyes.”

“I know. But I’m a crossbreed so my lineage might manifest itself differently.” She sighed and dropped her head into her hands. “I wish my stupid brain would just figure this all out already. The memories are obviously in there somewhere, I just can’t get to them.”

“If they’re going to come back to you they’ll do it in their own time. Your head injury was bad, Jia. It was a miracle that you were even conscious.”

“I know. The constant feeling of something missing is irritating though.” She frowned. “Because I can’t remember my past I’m never satisfied. Nothing I choose to do with my life ever feels right.”

“Does being here feel right?” She looked up at him in the dark before leaning over to flick on the lamp and nodding.

“It does,” she answered. “But that’s more than likely because I don’t remember being raised in the human world. This place is where I remembered how to read and write. It’s where I was given a name. It feels like everything positive in my life started and ended here except for Evan.”

“You realise you sound massively unhappy, right? Your home life can’t be that bad.” She looked away and he hummed quietly. “Or maybe it is. Want to talk about it?”

“Not really. You’ll tell Lucifer.”

“Not if you tell me not to.” He held up his marked palm and wiggled his fingers at her. “The pact lets you command me if you need to, remember?”

“I said I’d never do that to you.”

“I know,” he shrugged. “It doesn’t bother me. I knew what a pact entailed when I agreed to it.” She frowned, remembering something Lucifer said.

“How come you never told me you’re thousands of years old? When we made the pact I thought we were just stupid kids.”

“You never asked,” he replied, successfully distracted.

“Lucifer said you’re all ancient and that the only reason you looked like kids back then is because Satan punished you.” She drew her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them. “Do you seriously have to grow up again every time your body dies?”

“It depends on the severity of the death. If the body dies but stays intact we just heal and wake up again. If it gets obliterated we have to start from scratch. Depending on the amount of energy poured into the obliteration, we could take a few years to reach maturity or it could be decades.” He grinned. “Satan was pretty mad last time. I only reached physical maturity three years ago.”

“Lucifer said Bell fell for a human. Is that true?” Mammon nodded. “Will you tell me about it?”

“You’re best asking him yourself, shortstack. It’s pretty personal to him but he’d tell you all about it if you asked at the right time.” He smiled. “All you need to know about me is that I agreed to help Bell visit the human and Satan found out.”

“Demons are forbidden from having relationships with anyone from the human realm then?” she asked. Mammon sat forwards and picked at a loose thread on his pyjama bottoms.

“Not exactly. We can visit that world and interact with the beings there in any way we want. What we can’t do is fall in love. Especially not with humans, since they bear no Demonic or Angelic blood whatsoever.” He wrinkled his nose. “Falling for a Vampire would be seen as less heinous for us than choosing a human, which is a gross thought because most Vampires are mindless eating machines.”

“Is there a reason you can’t love a human or is it just Satan’s preference?”

“Did nobody tell you when you first came here? This is basic history for us.” She shook her head. “The reason we can’t love a human is because of Lilith. How much do you know about her?”

“Some stuff from human scripture.” She frowned as she tried to remember what she knew. “Something about her being the first wife of Adam and him deciding she wasn’t right for him because she was disobedient, so God made Eve.”

“Well that’s crap if I ever heard it,” Mammon snorted.

A/N: Aww, Mammon is such a sweetie worrying about Jia and her nightmare. Don’t forget to leave a heart or review if you’re enjoying the story!