Emily's Seams

Huntsville is about an hour and a half from the border. With Angus at the wheel, it took us forty-five minutes to get there.

Angus didn’t have any of the necessary papers to legally cross into the US. To be fair, he didn’t really have any papers. And neither did Mr. Puggums. They’d both be walking out of Canada.

“Alright now, you’re gonna hit the five as soon as you cross the border. Keep going and before you know it you’re gonna pass through this spit of a town called Blaine. Have yourself a little picnic at the harbour.” He hoisted Mr. Puggums out of the car. “We’ll come find ya. And I won’t be upset if you have a ham sandwich waiting on me.”

He turned, stopped suddenly and came back to the car. “You might want to put your aunt in your purse. You never know what kind of prick you’re gonna run into at the border check.”

I have no doubt that most of Jude was still at the crematorium. I’d heard that the bones never burnt well but the families usually didn’t want them. Maybe in another life I’d look down at such families, but right now I was really happy that the chunky, recognizably-human parts of my aunt were not here. Instead, what we did have of her was in a salsa jar. The urn the crematorium had given us didn’t close properly. With so much driving ahead of us, we couldn’t risk her spilling. I tucked her into the bottom of my bag and had my passport ready to go.

The border guard was fat and balding. He waddled as he walked around my car, trying on his meanest-don’t-fuck-with-America face, but honestly, I had to keep myself from laughing. His face reminded me of when Julia was five and had asked our mother why the old man was wearing his butt on his face. I’m not even kidding, my sister was perfect even then.

This guy was definitely wearing his ass on his face.

What’s your business?

How long are you coming down here?

Do you know anyone down here?

What do you do? For how long?

I swear, he just about asked me when I last took a shit. Finally, he handed my passport back and sent me on my way with a look I know he was hoping instilled terror. It just looked like he was clenching his butt face really hard.

Sure enough, as the sun began to touch down for the day, a cowboy and his cat came to join me at the Blaine Harbour. It wasn’t that it was far to walk, but the guards were intense and probably wouldn’t have thought twice about shooting Angus.

I handed him a black forest ham sandwich as he settled in beside me.

“I guess we should hurry the hell up, eh?”

Angus took a bite and nodded. “Let’s give this sunset a few more minutes. I made some bad choices when I was here the first time around but I always appreciated a good sunset.”

Seabirds cawed and the ocean’s saltiness was in every breath. I wasn’t living the best life either but from then on I knew I wouldn’t waste another sunset.