Chasing Love (Dark Love Series)

I finally give in, expressing my emotions in an explosive text.

Me: Stop treating me like I am yours! Do you think it was fair that I had to share you with Samantha? Do you think it was fair that I had to find out through the town whore that the one person who had my heart and soul knocked up his wife when he promised me he was no longer fucking her? You have no idea what it feels like to be abandoned by the only person who you trusted your life with, the only person who was your entire world, then not to even be given the chance to say goodbye. Yes, I love Julian, and yes, I’ll continue to see him. Maybe now you’ll understand what it’s like. What happened the other night was a mistake. Huge mistake. It’s over, Lex. We’re so over.

I sent the text, my heart beating furiously in my chest. Although I’m angry at him, I am angrier at myself for allowing this to happen in the first place. Did I really think having a make-out session would erase the past or give me closure? The scars are still ingrained in me, and no matter how hard I try to erase them, they’ll forever remain a part of me.

Staring out the window, the darkness is setting in. The streets are still lined with people, the city never shuts down despite the time of day.

So, I made a mistake, a big one.

I sigh out loud, this feeling of hurt, there’s no point denying it. I know I made the right decision by telling him to leave me alone, but I need closure, right? Fuck, Charlie, honestly, what the hell is wrong with you?

“Are we done, Charlotte?”

The voice behind me is just an illusion. Don’t do this again, Charlie, ache for someone who’ll never be who you need them to be.

“Tell me we’re done.”

I dare not move nor release a single breath. My limbs become completely frozen on the spot. Inside my chest, my heart is pounding louder and louder, the noise becoming increasingly unbearable.

Deep, heavy breathing sounds behind me, as the hairs on my arms stand at attention while chills run down my spine. Slowly, I turn my head, my eyes meeting his across the room.

With every step he takes closer to me, the temperature in the room becomes stifling hot causing my breathing to pick up at an uneven pace.

He stops just shy of where I stand, close enough for me to smell him.

Don’t Charlie.

Reaching out, he runs his finger along my collarbone, my body tensing at his touch.

“Lex, what are you doing here?”

“Well, you said you weren’t mine. I don’t take these things lying down, or maybe I should. It’s obvious you’re forgetting who you belong to. Who you’ve always belonged to.” His eyes are blazing, the tone of his voice dominant yet calm. That kind of calm terrifies me because I know it only means one thing—I have no chance of escaping.

He pushes my hair behind my shoulder, and leaning forward, he grazes his lips against my neck, inhaling my skin. The walls start to cave, the touch of his lips on my skin breaking them down piece by piece.

“I had to come back to remind you,” he murmurs.

His kisses become ravenous.

My self-control non-existent since the moment he walked in.

Why resist, Charlie? You’re fighting an uphill battle.

I yank his hair, pulling his mouth onto mine. His lips taste like heaven, his tongue meeting mine. Unable to stop, my tongue refuses to break from his, barely able to let go as he pulls away.

His eyes blaze with desire as he wraps his hand around my waist, laying me on my desk while forcing my legs open. Letting out a moan, his eyes widen while admiring my garters, running his hands up my thigh before he forcefully pulls me toward him then I wrap my legs around his waist.

Out of breath, with my heart running a marathon, his fingers clasp the buttons of my blouse, unbuttoning them at a slow and agonizing pace, exposing my breasts. There’s no delayed gratification, no admiring my naked form. His mouth ravages my breasts, sucking hard while I arch my neck, groaning beneath his touch.

“What are you doing to me?” I pant, desperate for answers.

“Well, Miss Mason, it’s time to make you remember who you belong to.”

He unzips his pants, his cock throbbing hard as it springs free and slaps against his ripped stomach. I watch him, wanting to taste it so bad, remembering how good he tasted inside my mouth.

Painfully slow, he grips my panties in his hand, sliding them to the side as his cock glides against my swollen clit. I brace for him, my body pleading to be at his mercy and feel him whole. The torment in his expression drives my desire beyond their limits, begging to take all of me right now. He guides himself inside me, my back arching in delightful pain.

I’m losing this battle. There’s no chance of coming out a winner. I desperately want more, his lips and hands to touch every part of me.

My phone begins to vibrate on the desk beside where I lay. Unable to answer, given my position, I allow it to ring out. It finally stops vibrating, only to start up again a few minutes later. Lex stops mid-thrust, trying to catch his breath. Grabbing my phone, he brings it to his sight, and without a shadow of doubt, his flared pupils and guttural roar are because Batman is calling.

“Answer it,” he demands.

What? He’s still inside me. This is insane.

“Let it go, Lex.”

“Answer it or I will,” he threatens, holding the phone in the air above me.

Should I call his bluff?

Can I even take the risk?

Lex lowers the phone to me as I struggle to untangle myself from him, but he forcefully holds me down.

Clearing my throat, I hit accept. “Hello?”

“Hey, gorgeous. I miss you. Come to my place tonight?” Julian asks, oblivious to my predicament.

Lex continues fucking me, slower, while he buries his head in my neck. His hand trails my breast, pinching my nipples as I try to respond without screaming my lungs out.

Is this happening?

“I’m still at work,” I respond, trying to keep my tone even. “Rain check?”

Lex quickly pulls his head away from my neck, his eyes turning a darker shade of green as jealousy rears its ugly head. With a vengeance, he pushes his cock deeper, my teeth biting down to refrain from moaning, the taste of blood lingering on my lips.

“Are you okay?” Julian questions, worried. “You sound out of breath.”

“I’m fine, just had to run for my phone. I’ll call you tomorrow. There’s something here I need to sort out.”

“No worries. Till tomorrow, gorgeous. I love you.”

What the fuck do I say?

“Me, too.”

I end the call as fast as humanly possible before letting out the loudest moan, relief washing over me from holding it in. Lex withdraws himself out of me, leaving me to whimper.

We aren’t done.

No one came.

“Did you just tell him you loved him?” he spits, nostrils flaring with rage consuming him.

“How dare you make me answer that call, Lex!” I lift my hand to slap him across the face, but he quickly grabs it, his grip overpowering mine.

“Tomorrow night you’ll be busy fucking me. You belong to me, Charlotte. Don’t mess with me anymore. You won’t like the punishment.”

“Fuck. You!”

“Since you had no problem keeping quiet over the phone, you’ll have no problem keeping quiet now.”

He flips me around, pushing my chest onto my desk. Forcefully, he uses his legs to spread mine as far apart as they’ll go. His cock slides back inside, and leaning over, he covers my mouth with his hand while pounding into me.

My desk is shaking, the papers flying everywhere. The screams are muffled in his hand, my body ready to combust from the intensity of his animalistic demand to own every part of me.

Quickly, he turns me back around, my hands gripping the edge of the desk.

Tilting his face, inches in front of mine, he commands me with his eyes. “You’re such a little bitch trying to make me jealous. No one else will fuck you like this. Come for me. Now.”

I bite into his hand, exploding all over him, the rush consuming every inch of my body and finishing with a blissful warmth. His thrusts are desperate as he lets go of my mouth, pounding me hard one more time before his body shakes, exploding inside of me.

Our breaths, shallow and uneven, command the room with its noise. Slowly, he pulls himself out of me, collapsing on my body.

What the hell am I doing?

I continue to lay still, trying to catch my breath.

Realization of our indiscretion comes crashing like a tsunami, the guilt following its footsteps afraid of not being felt. My chest begins to tighten, and consciously, I begin to button my blouse while he rests beside me breaking the silence between us.

“Lex, I meant what I said.”

He drags his body back on top of mine removing my hands from my blouse, undoing what I had done up, and finishes undressing me. His eyes immediately wander to the tattoo of the phoenix just above my pubic bone. Searching my eyes, he looks for an explanation, but it’s one I’m not ready to give.

“And I meant what I said, Charlotte.”

Trailing kisses down my body, he orders me to sit up on the desk, my legs spread. He lowers himself onto my pussy, tasting it slowly, circling his tongue around my clit. I’m caught by surprise, my body craving to convulse again as he sucks harder. Taking two fingers, he slides them inside of me, fucking me carelessly. My arousal, mixed with his own, is dripping around his fingers, only adding to the pure lust of this moment.

I need to taste him again, pushing his head away I demand he sit on my desk.

Taking a moment to admire how sexy he looks chained to my desk by the power I hold over him, I wrap my hand around his shaft, sliding my mouth up and down, tasting him whole.

“I am not finished with you,” he sputters, momentarily beyond words.

“I’m not finished with you.” I stand, climbing on top of him. Instead of fucking him, I turn around, positioning myself to sixty-nine. His body tenses, his groans intensifying.

“Oh fuck, baby, bring that pussy here.”

My moans intensify, his face buried between my legs while my mouth wraps around his cock. With every sordid lick, I take him in deeper, both of us competing against each other in this sick and twisted game we are playing.

“Lex, I can’t… take it anymore, I’m going to…” My body begins shaking. Frantically, I grab his cock, sucking it hard while I ride the orgasmic wave to another climatic finish.

Catching my breath with him buried in my mouth, the familiar taste hits the back of my throat, and succumbing to my own fantasies, I savor every last drop.

Once again, we lay silently trying to come up for much-needed air. My arms are like jelly, but I manage to climb off of him, collapsing on the desk beside him as I stare at the ceiling trying to calm the adrenaline running through me.

“When did you get the tattoo?” he questions with a low voice.

“Back in college.”

“What is it?”

“A phoenix.”

He pulls my body up, handing me my clothes. I’m feeling self-conscious, quick to bring my blouse to my chest. Beside me, he begins removing his shirt.

“Why are you taking your shirt off now?”

Watching him expose his chest, my jaw unwillingly drops at the sight of his tattoo, inked above his perfectly sculpted abs. Without thinking, I reach out, running my fingertips along it. The design is some sort of tribal tattoo, but when I look closely, the shadow is of a lion. It runs down the side of his torso and along his ribcage.

“Lions are a sign of power,” I mumble to myself, mesmerized by the amount of detail.

“Yes, they are, and the phoenix?”

I don’t want to discuss it, not now, not here when I’m so vulnerable.

“It’s late,” I tell him. “We need to go.”

He doesn’t push me for answers, instead helping me tidy my desk as I shut down the computer. With my purse in hand, I pick up my phone and see the text message on the screen.

Batman: Remember Batman has all these fancy tricks up his sleeve if you need a pick me up.

Lex glances my way, watching me read the message, though this time, ignoring it. My phone begins to buzz in my hand.

Adriana. Shit, I forgot!

I place her on speakerphone, so Lex doesn’t question me. “Adriana.”

“Charlie, I’m in your lobby! The doorman said he could let me up, but I thought I’d call you first.”

“I’m sorry, Adriana, I got caught up in something. Tell Jean he can let you in my apartment. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”

“Okay, sweet, see ya soon.”

Lex grins, bowing his head.

“Why are you smiling like that?” I ask, unable to hide my smile.

Seeing him smile makes my heart flutter stupidly. That arrogant prick is so fucking beautiful.

“You know Adriana is going to ask you a million questions, right? She’ll want nine years’ worth of information in the space of an hour.”

“I know. I wouldn’t expect anything less from her.”

We enter the elevator. I lean over, attempting to push the ground floor button. My hand is rudely pushed away. Lex slams his finger on the stop button.

“Time to make this a reality,” he growls, pushing my skirt up, taking me from behind.

Round three, here we go.

“I’m here, I’m here…”

I bolt through my front door, praying I don’t have anything running down my leg. This is all kinds of awkward, and Lex coming inside me was an afterthought. The bastard didn’t even have the nerve to ask me if I was on the Pill. Asshole.

“Hiya!” she beams, throwing her arms around me tightly.

I excuse myself, quickly, changing in my room to my sweats and a tank top. When I come back out, Adriana is reading a book from my coffee table.

“Anyways.” She puts the book down, facing me as I sit on the couch beside her. “Your place is amazeballs. What’s the name of your interior decorator?”

“Um, me… and have you been talking to Eric because I swear, Adriana, the two of you were separated at birth.”

“Oh-em-gee, he’s totally awesome, right? I can’t believe you did this yourself. You never liked designing or fashion before.”

“Things change, people grow. The designing part I started to enjoy when I lived with my grandmother. She had a taste for random knick-knacks, but somehow, she made it work.” I smile at the memory, welcoming the conversation. “On the weekends we’d go to flea markets looking for one-of-a-kind pieces. As for fashion, part of it was because of Nikki. We shared a room in college, and every time I’d have a date, she’d lend me her outfits. I kind of got a taste for it.”

“Will you please tell me more about your grandmother?”

“She was an amazing woman—” I hesitate, unsure how long I can go on without breaking down. “I only met her a few times when I was young because she and my mom didn’t really get along. When things in Carmel got too difficult, my dad spoke to her, and she welcomed me with open arms. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without spending those last five months with her. She was such a compassionate woman, so much wisdom. She held onto me when I needed hope and gave me the strength to see the future.”

I stop abruptly, knowing I can’t go on. Can I pour my heart out to Adriana and tell her my grandmother was there, holding my hand on the darkest day of my life? My heart tightens as I close my eyes, reliving the memory.

“She was sick, but she never told anyone. The day she passed away was when I found out.” The room falls quiet, my vision clouding as the emotions come to the surface. “Adriana, will you tell me what happened when you found out?”

Adriana shuffles on my couch, tucking her legs beneath her knees.

“I noticed Lex acting weird, but I had no idea about the baby. Samantha called us over one night, and she announced the pregnancy. Lex was furious. He didn’t want this to happen. My parents, of course, saw it as a blessing.” She clears her throat, but I sense she’s trying to be cautious with her words. “The next day we went over to see if Lex had calmed down. Samantha was home by herself, and she was visibly upset. She’d been crying, and as my mom consoled her, she told her that Lex was having an affair. When she said your name we were all in shock. My father was livid. He was ready to kill Lex. I was numb. You were my best friend and I felt betrayed by you.”

“Adriana, it was never my intention. I loved him so much…”

She raises her eyes to meet mine. “I thought about that. I thought maybe what you and Lex had was like Elijah and me, but Samantha kept telling me that you used me to get closer to Lex, and that all along you had your eye on him. I don’t know why I believed her. The biggest regret I have isn’t following my instincts. Instead, I gave up on our friendship.”

I let out a huge sigh, my shoulders wearing down. “You know what? It’s done, and now we move on.”

“Yes, I know. It’s like fate played a part.” Moving close to me, she rests her head on my shoulder just like old times. “Now, will you be my maid of honor?”

I turn to face her, the excitement hard to contain. “Of course, Adriana.”

We hug tightly again, and I think to ask the most important question. “Who’s designing the dress?”

She rambles on about the designers involved, and my heart fills with joy. I can’t believe Elijah has waited so long to propose, but I guess, like many of us, life just gets in the way.

“We planned our wedding three years ago, but right before the big day, Elijah became sick. We found out he had cancer. Thankfully, with plenty of chemo, he was able to walk away cancer-free and has had a clean bill of health for three years.”

“I’m so sorry. I can’t begin to imagine how difficult that must’ve been for you.”

“It was, but luckily, I had my family to support us. Lex exhausted himself finding the best cancer centers in the world. I don’t know what I would’ve done without him,” she tells me, falling silent for a few moments. “You know, he will be the best man at the wedding?”

I expected that to be the case. It isn’t about us, it’s Adriana and Elijah’s special day.

“It’s cool, Adriana. I’m sure we can both be in the same room as each other.”

My mind flashes to my office. Yes, we can be in the same room as each other but maybe not with our clothes on.

“Charlie, look, you don’t need to answer… but were you with him tonight? I won’t ask anything else because he’s my brother, and that would be TMI.”

I laugh, how awkward. I thought our sharing days were long gone. My phone vibrates, distracting me from responding to her.

Lex: My sister left you alone yet?

I think of a response but, instead, laugh to myself. My body is utterly exhausted, and even stringing together a sentence is difficult.

“Something funny?”

I show her the text, her eyes rolling until she joins me, laughing. “Charlie, have you thought about this? Aren’t you still engaged to Julian?”

Well, if that isn’t a slap in the face.

With Lex around, I’ve suddenly taken leave of my senses.

The guilt begins to seep in, all from the mention of his name.

“Adriana, it’s… I mean, Julian is a great guy. He worships the ground I walk on. But—”

“But he’s not Lex.”

No, he isn’t Lex. He’s a sweet, humble, compassionate, caring man. He treats me with respect, always sincere with his intentions. He makes me smile, never argues with me. Meanwhile, Lex has become this cold, arrogant son of a bitch who treats me like I’m his possession. Instead of making me smile, he angers me to the core.

“It’s been a long day.” I yawn, then continuing, “And Lex is, well, he’s complicated.”

“You’re telling me?” Adriana hoots. With her purse draped over her shoulder, she leans in to hug me one more time. “I better head off, but you and me… we’re back on.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” I smile.

As I climb into bed, my muscles tighten after the intensity of what had happened earlier. You’d think I was done, yet here I am, drenched between my legs, the images playing in my mind vividly. His cock eagerly waiting near my mouth.

Me: Yes, I am all alone now.

I want to write more. Tell him to get over here now and fuck my brains into next week right here in my bed.

Lex: Me too.

A quick but meaningful response. Bastard. Letting out a long-winded sigh, I text back quickly.

Me: You’re not alone, you have your hand. Pink wrote a whole song about it.

Lex: As much as that song brings pleasure to people, I’d rather you bring pleasure to me, right now.

Fuck, I’m screwed. I read the message a dozen times, and every time I read it, my hands automatically make their way down to my pants, rubbing slightly to ease the pain. I quickly type a message, then continue to explore.

Me: Greedy, always wanting more.

Lex: Charlotte, with you… never enough.

His last text sends me over the edge, and I come on the spot. Granted, it’s nowhere near as good as when I’m with him, but I’ve already been fucked twice today.

Exhausted, I drift off to sleep within minutes.

“Well, hello, there, Miss Mason. You look awfully happy this morning,” Eric comments with one of his eyebrows raised.

“It’s going to be a busy day. You know I thrive on a full schedule.”

“Uh-huh, full schedule.” He turns to Emma, whispering, “More like a full load of man juice in her waterhole.”

“Hey, I heard that,” I yell, walking toward my office.

As I open the door, like a crime scene before me, the memories of last night come flooding back. I try to settle in, strapped for time since today has back-to-back client meetings.

“Charlie… earth to Charlie!” Eric is sitting across from me, planner out with his pen in his mouth, watching me with a curious gaze.

“Sorry, Eric, let’s start.”

“Should we start by discussing why it smells like raw, animalistic sex in your office?”

“You watch too much porn.”

“No… although I do believe I now have an unhealthy obsession with Andrew McCarthy.”

“Um, what? How is that even possible? You were born in like, what…” I count my fingers trying to figure out what year he was born.

“A true gentleman does not reveal his age. Anyway, they played the movie Pretty in Pink last night, and let me tell you, I don’t know at what point they ever thought that dress was prom-worthy. I have dish towels that look better than that.”

“The fact that you’re a Pretty in Pink virgin should’ve been raised a long time ago. It’s like the movie of all movies. Not seeing it is like not knowing Madonna sings ‘Material Girl,’ and I’d like to also point out your dish towels are purchased from the same place the Queen buys them from, thanks to your mother.”

“Fine, so shoot me. Less about tea towels and back to your bang-bang on the desk.”

“Sorry, E, subject closed. We have a brief to work on.”

“You’re such a party pooper, Charlie.”

“Yeah, preach it to the world with your hundred-dollar royal dish towels.”

We briefed for an hour before Eric left my office. The first few appointments were nothing out of the ordinary until I heard a knock on my door. “Come in.”

“Charlie, there’s someone here for you.” Eric glances at me nervously.

Oh fuck, please don’t tell me it’s Lex. There’s no way I can resist him, and I’m not comfortable fucking him in broad daylight with the whole office present.

“Who is it?”

“Mrs. Benson.”

“I don’t know who that is, but fine, let her in.”

He leaves the room, returning with her a few moments later.

“Hello, Charlie.”

“Samantha?”

In my head, all I hear is the imperial march from Star Wars, and she’s Darth Vader. The realization of her inside my office is surreal. A week ago, I hadn’t seen Lex for nine years. Not only have I fucked him, now I’m standing here in my office with his ex-wife, the woman whose life I broke by my immature indiscretion.

“I’m sorry I didn’t arrange a meeting. Can we talk?” she asks.

I motion for her to sit. “Is there something I can help you with?”

“I want to apologize. Charlie, I’m sorry. The whole thing with Alex…”

I’m stunned by her need to apologize. She’d never done anything wrong. She married the man of her dreams, hardly a mistake.

She fumbles with her hands as she speaks. “I knew well before the pregnancy that he loved you. I could see the way he looked at you. I made mistakes, so many, but the one thing I don’t regret is my baby girl.”

A tear falls down her cheek, catching me by surprise. I hand her a box of tissues, unsure of what to say.

“I’m sorry, too, Samantha. He was yours. I was young and stupid and shouldn’t have let it get that far.”

Like words trapped inside a vault, the release is more satisfying than I had ever anticipated. I wasn’t a victim in the games we played, I held an equal part in creating the tangled web.

“I know life would’ve been different for you if I had just let you be together,” she stumbles, sniffing.

“You made vows to each other. I had no right—”

She holds out her arms, interrupting me. “I hope you can forgive me.”

Accepting her embrace, we both hold onto each other tightly.

“Charlie, his heart never belonged to me, it always belonged to you, and it still does. Don’t let your stubbornness get in the way of true love.”

She pulls away with a smile on her face and glassy eyes, walking out of my office with a gracious wave.

I’m left dumbfounded.

For years, I envisioned what it would be like if we ran into each other. The nasty names she would call me, the way she’d pull my hair and kick me to the ground like a wrestler gone wild. Caught in my own emotions, I never once stopped and thought about her feelings or how I destroyed her marriage. And now, we’ve both forgiven each other for the mistakes we made, and the feeling of remorse is lifting from my shoulders like a cloud disappearing over the horizon.

Acting on impulse, I grab my phone and dial Adriana.

“Hey, girl. What’s up?”

“I need a favor from you. A really big favor.”

I can’t believe what I’m asking of Adriana, but I want him to know he doesn’t hold all the cards. Lex Edwards has turned into an egotistical, selfish bastard. He thrives on power, that much I know.

But underneath his powerful exterior, lies a weakness.

And I know exactly what that is.

We are both pawns in the wicked game we’re playing, but I know we are beyond being able to stop.

So now, Mr. Edwards, hold on.

I’m going to get you where it hurts the most.