Born From Ash (Book I of The Flame Trilogy)

Another week passes and Dimitri and I continue to argue. It’s gotten to the point where Alexei has to keep us apart otherwise, we would end up at each other’s throats.

He used to visit me every day to check on me but he stopped after we started arguing. I know that he’s still keeping tabs on me though because someone else always comes instead, making sure I eat and rest; usually Angel, Irina or Viktorya.

Their insistent care is highly endearing but the only thing I feel is guilt for enjoying the way I’m being treated. Being unaccustomed to the feeling, it simply adds to my building frustration. I hate that they’re pampering me whilst people are being tortured and killed because of Aleksandr.

Because I’m not stopping him.

I’m almost sure that my memory is key to figuring this whole thing out, but from the looks of it, I’m the only one who is remotely bothered about getting them back. I smile, waving politely to Irina as she leaves before freeing myself from the cuffs on the bed. I wait, maybe 15 minutes before finally getting up, being led by nothing more than my frustration, tiredness and sheer spontaneity.

I storm into Dimitri’s office, my body tingling at the memory of what happened the last time I was in here. I shake it off quickly, I’m here for a reason and I don’t need to think about the strange connection that we have because I would lose focus.

Alexei stands to his left whilst Mikhail and Viktor stand around the room, though I don’t acknowledge any of their presences. They all seem busy: looking at maps and shuffling through papers. The banging of the doors causes their attention to snap towards me in alarm.

My eyes burn with a new ferocity; gaze locking with Dimitri’s, his eyes like steel. I think he can sense the flame burning behind my gaze because, if possible, his glare turns harder at my approach.

Fire tempers steel.

I’ve had enough of being treated like an invalid, I will get my memories back one way or another- even if it means going behind Dimitri’s back. Maybe he isn’t the man I thought he was and if that’s the case, I have to look elsewhere for someone to help me.

“You said there was another way to get my memory back.” I stop, planting my feet in front of his desk; my eyes never once leaving his. “Or were you lying because you’re actually an incompetant sack of shit?”

Insulting his position would’ve been a death wish had I been any other wolf, perhaps I’m pushing his buttons to see how far he would let me go. How much leeway would I get for being his mate? Who knows such information could come in handy in the future.

I can feel the power radiating off of him, a deep growl ripping from his throat. He’s an Alpha, and he has enough power to bring part of me to my knees, surrendering at his feet. But my defiance knows no bounds, and I’m not just some obedient wolf, I’m so much more; even Dimitri is hardly a match for me.

“Arashi, you are not fully healed yet. Go and rest. Now.” He grunts, ignoring my challenge.

There’s utter silence while he speaks, his men waiting with bated breath for his response. It seems to his pack that his word is law, whatever comes out of his mouth is absolute and has to be followed.

I want to be angry at him for turning me away and commanding me; even though everything he says is true I won’t accept it. I can’t. A part of me wants to gush that he’s looking after me and taking so much care of me, but I know that even though he’s right, I’m right too. And so, even though it’s surprisingly difficult, I push away any feeling of familiarity I feel towards him.

I have to remind myself of my mission, I can’t afford to start getting attached. It scares me that I can’t pinpoint exactly when staying focused had gotten so difficult. Though considering that everything has felt like a hurricane since I arrived it isn’t entirely surprising that it’s passed me by... was it?

“No!” My hand slams against his desk in defiance, my voice hard and unrelenting.

“You have already crossed the line of insolence, mate. Do not make it any worse.” His warning growl reverberates around the room, it almost feels like it’s shaking.

“No!” I growl. He does not take well to my challenge of his authority, but I continue to speak before he can either move or talk over me. “I came here for help, to help you. All you do is sit on your asses all day, pampering me like a fucking princess while people are putting their lives on the line. So what exactly is your problem Alpha? You can’t finish?”

I put every ounce of venom into my words- it’s a low blow to insult Dimitri’s manhood. Especially when I know that he can in fact finish. Quite well too. But I don’t think he understands how mad I really am. Besides, if I’ve already crossed the line, I might as well sprint as far as I can before the consequences come down on me.

There’s a stillness around us as the men take in my words, letting them sink in. They don’t understand. Not really. They are all selfish, only thinking of their pack, their Alpha-Female, themselves. Maybe they don’t realise exactly how much is really at stake here. I’ve always been blunt, but they’ve never seen any of the action that’s actually going on in Shadow Fang.

“Either you help me get my memories back, or I’ll find someone that will.” My threat hangs mid-air, and from the deadly glint in my eyes, Dimitri knows that I’m not playing around.

He has his own look; a mix of pride, anger, and definitely a promise of punishment later. I can’t say that I care, after all he’s finally going to help me. Perhaps I have crossed a line, but nobody ever starts a rebellion by playing nice. If I have to get an Alpha angry to see results, then that’s exactly what I’ll fucking do.

“There’s a witch from the realm of Valria who may be able to help, I’ll give her a call.” He says heavily. I can tell just from the look in his eyes that he doesn’t really want to call her but given my new ultimatum, I haven’t given him much of a choice.

I nod in acknowledgement; his lack of further response makes me presume that I’m dismissed. I turn around walking out of his office with a triumphant smirk.

“And Arashi.” He calls out as my hand touches the door handle; turning my head to one side I see his hulking figure standing behind his desk in my peripheral vision. I don’t even bother to give him my full attention. I hear the promise in his voice, hard as steel and absolutely dangerous when he continues to speak.

“You will be punished for disrespecting me in front of my pack members.”

I have a feeling that this punishment won’t be as pleasurable as the last.

The witch comes early the next day. She appears to be a middle-aged woman with an eerily timeless beauty. Her long white hair is twisted into large, neat dreadlocks that frame her unwrinkled face showing off the marked lines that decorates her dark skin. Her eyes are emeralds glistening against its mahogany backdrop; there’s a deep knowledge behind them far beyond her time. She’s both tall and slender, reminding me of a nymph with her grace and beauty.

She isn’t what I expected at all. I had imagined a hunched over, old woman with a pointy nose and a wicked grin. Aleksandr has said that Witches are evil tricky creatures and have long been hunted and are now supposedly extinct. I’m slowly coming to realise much of what I thought was true are all lies.

She sits opposite me on one of the chairs in Dimitri’s office, the man himself sits behind his desk with his chin on his hands and his Beta stands to his left.

“What you want me to do comes with several risks.” She seems reluctant, “Why is this so important to you, child?”

“Lady Azura, Please. This is the only way I’ll be able to stop the chaos.” I grab her hands, trying to make her understand with everything within me. A sudden jolt hits me, an image coming across the forefront of my mind.

Black leathery wings, claws, blood, and a blinding red moon.

I look at her with wide eyes, my question dying on my tongue as she pulls her hands away abruptly, looking at me startled. “You harbour the fires of hell within you.”

I remain silent, letting her eyes roam over me in question and then in revelation, her green eyes glistening. She can see me for what they have made me into, for what I try so desperately to hide away. She shines light onto my soul, revealing its true darkness.

I look away from her knowing eyes, the feeling of shame and hatred overwhelming me. It’s so intense that it begins to seep out my pores, permeating the air with the sickly smell. I don’t dare look at any of the other faces in the room- I am unnatural, a creation made for the sole purpose to destroy.

“Let me search your soul.”

Her hands reach back over to hold mine gently in hers. They are surprisingly rough and worn with age- the hands of a labourer. Her eyes look at me with a new curiosity. Maybe she senses my urgency or my desperation to know, but I can see she’s conflicted as to whether she should help me or not.

I guess this will help her to make up her mind.

She peers deep into my purple eyes, her own green eyes swirling, almost putting me into a dizzying trance. Her hands hold my head in place as she rests her forehead on mine. Her grip becomes tighter as she begins to chant under her breath, I can’t hear exactly what she’s saying but I know that it isn’t any tongue spoken in Innonia.

She pulls away suddenly, breaking whatever connection she made, I gasp at the pain. It feels like something has been torn away from my mind.

“Mother Selene of the night, has given you a fate that will define history.” She whispers in awe.

I have to hold in my snort at her mention of the fictitious deity. The Werewolf’s commonly addressed her as Artemis or the Moon Goddess, but over the span of thousands of years she has managed to develop several names. Whatever her name, it doesn’t change the fact that she isn’t real.

“I see your doubts, Arashi Hajime of the Dawn Stalkers pack. But know this, your role in this world is far greater than you or your mate could ever perceive. You will need each other to overcome what you must face, as time goes on you will see how alike the paths of destruction and salvation appear. Trust in one another and you will not fail.”

I hold her gaze as she continues to peer deep within me, as if searching for something. I don’t know if she finds what she’s looking for, but before I can ask, she stands leading me to the sofa near the coffee table. With my hand in hers, she guides me to sit before she gently pushes my shoulders, gesturing for me to lie down.

Dimitri stands immediately, following us and watching every movement intently. I lie against the cool leather, the armrest supporting my head gently. My body doesn’t take up the entire seat considering I just reach 5ft 3 in height.

“Your mind has been tampered with, and I will unblock it. Your memories are the key to finding out who you are, but do not hope for them to give you a solution; that is something you must do together.” She signals for Dimitri to come closer and stand close to me. She gives him a look to which he nods, I have an unsettling feeling that this is going to hurt.

“What are you going to do?” I ask. I’m curious, and if I wasn’t so stubborn, I might’ve admitted that I’m slightly frightened.

“I have to break the mental barriers that have been placed in your mind. I can only remove those created by external forces, you will have to bring down your own.” Her hands go to my temples, slender fingers hovering over my pale skin. I feel Dimitri kneeling beside my body as he holds down one of my shoulders, his other hand intertwined with my own.

Then the pain begins.

It’s like she is passing currents through my brain, frying it. The shocks and tremors ricochet through my entire body. My senses leave me, and I’m unsure of what’s happening, of who I am.

There is a pressure building against my chest, and an even greater pain pushing against my skull. My entire body convulses with the sheer power of what is happening to me.

I hear a scream, it sounds far off in the distance. The burning in my throat makes me realise that it’s mine. There’s shouting, growling and that building pressure gets worse by the minute. There’s a burning within me as if I’m being set on fire, burning from the inside out. Sweat pouring off me from the sheer intensity of the heat and exertion.

I feel as if I’m transported elsewhere, there are lightning fast flashes of places and people. Long forgotten memories of a time from long ago, in a far-off place. More flashes too quick for me to see engulf me and I start to get dizzy from it. Then it’s like I’ve been flung into an ice bath- cold, freezing cold.

The shock brings me back down. Too far down. I barely register the trickle of blood leaving my nose as a ringing feeling encompasses me. The last thing I hear is Dimitri’s frantic calls as I slip back into a terrifying darkness.