Chapter 20
I sighed and wrapped my arms around my legs, pulling them tighter to my chest. “I don’t know what is going on lately. George hasn’t been himself at all. He drinks alcohol, even though he was strictly against it, and he says things he never said before. I know he is a lovely person, with a big heart, and he loves me to pieces. But he acts like such an idiot.”
“You can’t think of anything that might have happened?” Tyra asked.
I shook my head. “The whole wolf thing aside these past days, our only issue was that the pregnancy plan didn’t work out. I knew it was frustrating for both of us, but he never acted as if it was bothering him to such a degree. I wouldn’t have thought it was a reason for him to change, but Jelto told me he was complaining about it to him and the other colleagues the other day. It’s when I realized it might hurt him more than he admits to me.”
“It’s understandable to feel frustration, but it shouldn’t be a matter to talk about with strangers. Especially not when the partner doesn’t know about it,” she said, a frown on her face.
“I know. I thought the same. It’s his biggest wish to start a family, and I want his dream to come true, but if it’s not working, what am I supposed to do? He knows we technically have no physical issue. Maybe that’s making it even worse for him. He has nothing to blame it on. Some days he wondered if it was God’s punishment for having sex before marriage, but it’s not that we could have been married before, either. His parents hate me.”
Tyra sat up and held up a hand. “Wait, wait. You can’t marry because his parents hate you? What does that have to do with them? If you love each other, you can just marry.”
“I wish it was so easy. He insisted on having his parent’s blessing.”
She furrowed her brows. “I don’t understand his thought process. Why would he think his parents would like you more when he goes against what the community believes in? If sex before marriage is frowned upon, wouldn’t it make things worse?”
I let go of my legs and dropped backward on the sofa, staring at the ceiling. “That is what I told him, too. But he said his parents would love to have grandchildren. He was certain if they knew they would become grandparents, they would accept me. I probably should have questioned it more and shouldn’t have agreed to his plan, but he was so convinced. He seemed as if he wanted it that way, and I agreed. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“I don’t think you made a wrong move. In the end, it was decided on by both of you. You didn’t force him, and he didn’t force you. You are both adults, and sometimes things just don’t work out. But it surely isn’t God’s punishment, and you know why it’s not working. Don’t say the opposite again.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. “No couple has the guarantee of it working quickly.”
“You still don’t believe it? Come on, admit it.”
“Even if it’s true, it’s not an explanation I could offer George.”
She sighed. “This isn’t any of my business, and you can choose whichever partner you want, but if you want my opinion, I can offer that.”
I sat up again. Tyra looked serious, making me wonder if I wanted to know what she had to say. But running away from words I might not want to hear wasn’t an option either. “Go ahead.”
“If you want to stay with George, you either have to tell him the truth or you have to fix your lies. You need to give him a reason things might not work out regarding your pregnancy, and you have to think about reasons you might need more time for yourself because your wolf will need her freedom. Or you have to tell him the truth and see how he reacts. But remember, we aren’t supposed to tell humans what we are. More often than not, it will lead to complications. One way or another, it probably will lead to situations you might want to avoid. Is that what you want? Risking the life of all the other ancient wolves by revealing us, or living together with him with all those lies until the rest of your lives?”
Of course, I didn’t want to lie to him forever. Besides, most times lies won’t stay lies. It only needs one mistake to cause the house of cards to collapse. But telling him I was a wolf? That shapeshifters are real. If his parents heard about it, who knew what would happen?
“I know you care a lot about him and letting him go hurts. But sometimes letting go is the only way to stop the pain. I’m not saying this because I want you to join us. I’m saying this because I see you struggle, and George seems to be out of it, too. You might be able to push through longer, but is that what you want?”
She smiled at me softly and patted my knee. “In the end, it’s up to you. Follow your instincts and do what feels right, even if it might hurt. Regardless of your decision, I hope we can stay in touch.”
“I would like to stay in touch with you, too,” I said.
“We can make it work, I promise you. It might be hard to let you stay here, but we can convince the pack to see you as an ally rather than a threat.”
I nodded, but I wasn’t too convinced. What if they wouldn’t be able to let me stay? How should I explain to George that I wanted to move away?
“Also, take care of the burn mark on your chest. It looks pretty nasty.”
I glanced down at my chest, the red burn mark looking worse than before. It didn’t hurt much, though, at least it didn’t until I got reminded of it again.
“Cedric gave me an ointment to use,” I said.
She smiled. “Then up you go. I don’t want to kick you out, but it honestly worries me to look at it.”
“It’s okay, I should probably head home and see if George is back,” I said, my stomach feeling heavy at the thought of seeing him.
She pulled me into a hug. “It will be fine.”
I held onto her and enjoyed the comfort she offered for a moment before pulling away. “Thank you.”
She smiled at me. “No problem.”